Stop Trying to Figure it Out

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." ~Proverbs 3:5
How many times have we all read this verse?  For many of us this is a favorite verse that reminds us to trust God no matter the circumstances.  I know I've looked to this verse many times to help me in times of trial.  However, I realized over the last few days how often we focus on the first part of this verse (Trust in the Lord with all your heart...) but forget the second part, "...and lean not on your own understanding."

Having grown up outside of the church I was taught to look at logic and reasoning to help me solve problems or understand solutions.  I've always enjoyed helping people figure out a solution to their problems and making predictions about what might happen next based off of patterns that I see whether it be in a story/movie or real life.  So when I came to know Jesus I took this with me.  Excited to see how the Lord would work I would try to figure out what His solutions would be before they happened and want to know why God was doing things the way He was doing them.  Each time I would do this I would notice that I would be filled with anxiety and emptiness.  That was when I realized the second part of this verse.  It's been in these moments that I go off of my own understanding because that's all I have, but I'm not supposed to be leaning on my own reasoning.  I'm not saying that we follow God with totally blind faith, but we ask for His understanding and realize that we're only meant to understand so much.  We're not God, we didn't create everything existence, so we're not going to get all of our questions answered.  This is faith, that we say to God, "I trust You to move" instead of saying "When You move I'll trust You".  Our faith shouldn't be conditional, just like our love shouldn't be conditional.

We also have to realize that when we go off of our understanding and make decisions based off of it that we're going to make a mess because we're humans, we're flawed!  If we really want to follow God and see all of the incredible blessings that He has for us then we need to follow Him and discern His understanding from our own so we can best follow Him.  Faith is trusting without fully understanding.  Joyce Meyer actually wrote in Battlefield of the Mind about abandoning our reasoning because it can distract us from God's voice and God's work in our lives.  If we're relying on our reasoning then we're not relying on God, and if we're not relying on God then we're not trusting God, and if we're not trusting God then often times we're not following Him.  So ask God for His understanding, wisdom, and discernment in your life and let go of your own so that you may follow Him with a much stronger faith!

"My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts and my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.  For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

Drop the Expectations

This weekend I had an amazing time at SMASH, my church's all-women's retreat, up at SpringHill camp!  I was able to spend time with some of my beloved sisters-in-Christ having fun, meeting new people, hearing amazing messages, and spending time with my Prince!  However, before I left I was in a spiritual funk.  Some things hadn't gone the way I thought it should or the way I thought God was leading and I was confused and struggling to connect with God.  I was also feeling trapped, like I had to move or I couldn't grow anymore, and I thought it was because a big change was coming.  What I didn't realize until the retreat was that my feeling trapped was being caused by expectations.  And let me be clear, these expectations were not put on me by God, and very few were placed on me by others.  The expectations trapping me were placed on me were bestowed by none other than myself.

My walk this past year has not been easy, and I've constantly had this feeling that I didn't fit in.  I felt that I should be married like my friends and thinking of starting a family, I felt that I should already have a better job and be living out of my parents house, and I felt that I should know my calling for the Kingdom.  Yet God doesn't feel it's best for me to have none of these yet.  And it would leave me in a state of confusion or a state of obsessive hope that something, anything, would move!  And when it didn't I felt like God had left me.  But I realized this weekend that this was far from the truth!  God was with me, but I couldn't hear His voice or feel His presence because I was too concerned with me and what I felt like God would want for me because I wanted it (I know this probably sounds confusing, but just roll with it).  I couldn't hear from God because I was too busy listening to myself and the world.  And sometimes it takes a change of location and scenery to truly understand that.  So finally I took all these expectations, confessed my sinful selfish thoughts, and peacefully accepted God's expectations for me, which were so much lighter!  He expects me to worship and glorify Him, to spend time with Him, to love others, and to share the light He gave me with others.  He expects me to accept His grace because of the cross, and to put Him first before all else in my life!  And you know what?  It's wonderful, it's peaceful, and it's joyful!  His expectations don't condemn, they love!  How wonderful!

So now I'm finally back to a state of peace where I rebuke unfair expectations that distract me from God's incredible love!  And now I'm free to dance with my Prince and accept whatever He brings me!  I'm not worried about when I'll get married or have children because He is enough for me, and I know that the season of life that I'm in right now is being used to prepare me for the seasons that are coming!  God is good all the time, and we can see it if we will get out of our own way!  So I challenge you to look at the expectations that either you or the world are putting on your shoulders and give them to the One who's expectations are much better!