Not that long ago a friend of mine and I were talking. She had just been through a difficult experience and she was feeling a lot of hurt. What confused her the most was that she couldn't figure out why she was in so much pain because nothing was actually done to her or with the purpose of hurting her, but yet she felt the pain. As she was explaining this to me I felt like there was something under the surface that even she couldn't see. "I wonder if God's trying to tell you that there's a wound that needs to be healed, one that's had a bandaid over it so long you forgot it was there. Maybe he wants to explore that with you and help you to heal it for good", I told her. She thought about it and admitted that there might be as tears came to her eyes. A few days later we reconnected and I asked her how she was doing. Instead of tears a bright smile came to her face, and she proceeded to tell me all about what God had shown her and what He had done. He had helped her to discover the wound, one that had been there for close to 15 years, and how many times the enemy had attacked her, aggravating the wound and causing her to try to shut it out, how he had brought her there and offered her true healing by the power of the Spirit and she accepted it. The joy that came from her was obviously from one source, Jesus.
After we're born we go through many experiences, experiences that can either build us up or harm us. They can come from our families and friends, or from things we've done. Those experiences that harm us leave emotional wounds and false messages, and cause us to deal with our pain in the wrong ways. We can become controlling to assure we won't experience that again, we can put a bandaid on to dull the pain, we can turn to what we know we can do well or hide ourselves from the world. But the messages that continue to radiate from them show that they're still there and they're not healing. These messages can sound like "I'm not good enough", "I'm too much", "I'm not lovable", "I'm not strong enough", "I'm not worthy", etc. etc.
If you're not quite sure what I'm saying let me give you an example. Throughout my relationship with my fiancee I've struggled with physical purity. While intimate acts are a main form of showing and sharing love in a marriage, the acts can leave wounds when outside of that covenant. The affects of my sin came in the form of anxiety and struggling to see and accept God's love for me. I felt dirty and kept getting angry at myself when I didn't obey God's commands regarding physical purity. The message became "I'm not good enough, I'm not strong enough. I'm not worthy of God's love". Why was this area in particular so harming? 1 Corinthians 6:18 explains it by saying, "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but however sins sexually, sins agains their own body. (NIV)" This sin didn't just affect God, it affected me. And worse still, I was dragging my fiancee down with me and causing him to sin. My reaction to these messages was to put a bandaid on it by trying to control situations and saying that I could get ahold of it. I could be strong enough, I could put my foot down, I could implement rewards to help us be good. God broke down all of my efforts to control the situation and showed me that I didn't need another bandaid, I needed spiritual cleansing and healing. So I prayed, fully and honestly, and asked Jesus for a second chance. I asked for the cleansing of my body and spirit, a return of my purity (of sorts), and for Christ to help me work through the wound that had been developing and festering. And just as Jesus healed many during his 3 years, he healed me and said, "Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering (Mark 5:34 NIV)". The healing of the wound has begun, but my purity is renewed, and with God's help I hope to maintain it till my wedding night, and I look forward to seeing how God will change me and my fiancee as we strive to obey His commands with strength and patience from the Spirit.
I challenge you today to ask Jesus to help you identify the lies that have developed from the wounds inflicted on you. Then ask him to walk with you as you remove the bandaids from your emotional wounds and work to heal them with his help. He will not leave you alone and He won't make you do it alone. I can promise you, you will feel so much better and closer to God with the wound gone than you do will with just a bandaid solution.
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